This lesson from the Course in Miracles is one (of many) worth paying careful attention to. Whatever it is you are offering to others has to move through your
body. It is your only vehicle for communication. When you are angry with another, it is your body that feels the anger. When you are loving to another, again, it is your body that feels the love. What do you want to feel today?
The Course in Miracles focuses on the perspective that there is no
separation and that what we do onto another we are doing onto ourselves and that all grudges we hold against another show us where we need to forgive ourselves. Whether this aligns with your beliefs or not, it still holds that you cannot seek vengeance or even hold a negative thought towards anyone, without feeling the impact in your body-mind.
As an experiment, just think about someone you’re upset with. If you pay attention, you will notice certain sensations in your body. You may feel butterflies in your stomach, a tightening
in your throat, or a gripping in your shoulders. Undoubtedly, it won’t be a pleasant sensation. So, for now, just open inside and let the anger dissolve as best you can.
Now, as part two of the experiment, think about someone you feel very loving towards. Perhaps a child or pet. Again, notice the sensations in your body. Much more pleasant, yes?
What’s happening? There are receptor sites all over your body for your emotional molecules (Candace Pert, Molecules of Emotion). This means we can have a response in the body, which we later understand to be fear, anger or love, before the thought comes into awareness. It also means that thoughts create sensations in the body.
I’m not saying that you should never be angry at anyone. Anger is an important tool. It shows us when boundaries have been violated and where we may be being treated inappropriately. But sometimes, we get angry or irritated about little things or no consequence. In these cases, you might pause and ask yourself, “Is this a gift I’m willing to receive?” “Or, am I enjoying this upset?” If yes, by all means, go for it (consciously). If not, see if you can soften, open and let go. And remember, this is not about anyone else. Let go because it feels good to you.